Monday, May 16, 2011
High Maintenance Diva...
I go around telling myself that I'm a low maintenance kind of a gal. A little Burt's Bees lip shimmer and a smokey eye shadow sloppily brushed around my lashline and I'm out the door.
Maybe I think this because I don't do the normal stuff women my age do, I take a more wholistic approach to everything.
But the reality of it is that I am probably even more high maintenance than most. Just go out for a bite to eat with me and see the look on the servers face taking my order with all my substitutions and directions. Okay, so I don't inject stuff into my face, but I do face yoga (yes, I look like a total ass doing it, but so what), I don't blow dry my hair, but I am meticulous about the cut. I'm a skin care product connoisseur and OCD label reader. I don't do spray tans (I'm too petrified I will turn orange and smell like cat pee) (not to mention that the skin is our largest organ and spray tans are chemicals seeping into our blood stream via this organ causing toxicity), but I do allow myself a little sunshine each and every day weather permitting without sunscreen, vitamin D is essential to happiness and health. Add in daily skin brushing, thai massage, prayer, meditation, reading/study and a lot of other wholistic rituals and I'm right up there in the high maintenance column.
I have an all or nothing kind of attitude when it comes to stuff like this, I'm competitive by nature, even with just myself. I can obsess about a lifestyle change and then burn out because I go to extremes and I don't pace myself. I'm learning that I can do things in small doses and I don't need to be competitive about it. Slow and steady wins the race. For example with raw veganism, my first impulse (which I followed) was to throw out all non-compliant foods, re-stock everything and go full throttle into being a raw vegan and then of course I crashed and burned and took everyone down around me. I do this with exercise and sports too. Nowadays, I do a little here and a little there. If I'm taking a load of laundry into my closet, I will stop on the way out and do some girly push ups at my sink vanity. If I'm going to meditate in my bed, I will do a few dips on my mattress. Some squats or lunges here and there, some plie's or other ballet moves. Rather than do a series of yoga postures I will do one and hold it for five minutes or longer, Lucas Rockwood at YogaBody says we do more good by holding the postures rather than fluidly and rapidly moving onto the next and then the next. Throughout the day I'm doing a little here and a little there and it all adds up. As far as diet, I'm going to use this approach as well. I'm adding a few tried and true raw recipes that we all love and eat and slowly wean us off or at least mostly off of cooked and/or toxic foods. It's hard work being raw, there is lots of preparation involved. I have some foods stocked that help me with sweet and salt cravings. If I need salt or "meaty" foods, I make myself a sprouted bread sandwich (not raw, but still good), with avocado, tomatoes and baby greens with a bit of veganaise and himalayan salt. For sweet, I make a raw banana cream pie with a nut crust with coconut oil and some himalayan salt (it gives it that yummy salty and sweet taste and no guilt). I've stayed away from cacao after reading how harmful and addictive it is. I'm weaning us off soy products for the same reasons and veggie sausage is a huge staple in our home. I love the field roast brand veggie sausage, smoked apple sage is my favorite, not raw, but it's getting us off toxic soy products. Miso soup is the only good soy product because it is fermented. I make a yummy raw chipotle cashew cheese that really helps with the cravings and we all love it as well and it's extremely versatile. Purple cabbage leaves used as taco shells filled with tomatoes, avocado, broccoli, salsa, cilantro and chipotle cashew cheese is delish. The other favorite in our family is raw kelp noodles prepared with shredded cabbage, green onions and a thai peanut (raw almond butter) dressing topped with raw sliced almonds. And of course replacing one meal a day with a fruit and veggie smoothie, loaded with dark leafy greens. So these are the little things I can implement throughout the week to make a huge impact in the long run. I don't need to conquer the world in one day.
I remember back when I played tennis. I would obsess about getting a shot perfect. I would watch videos and practice till all hours and then sob uncontrollably because it wasn't perfect. I would play in leagues and my competitiveness was ugly. I remember subbing in a league and knocking this poor girl down with my serve, she said, "you hit like a man" and I turned around, grinned at my doubles partner and did a little "oh yeah" fist gesture, totally pleased with myself and ignoring that I just hurt someone. I stopped playing for this reason. I was a little McEnroe in pink Adidas. I read an affirmation once that really registered with me. There is no competition in Christ. I say it often. I notice there are certain people with whom I am very competitive with and I don't like myself around them. I know it's because they themselves are also competitive and it's just our energy doing the dance. I don't need to be competitive with myself or anyone else, I have forever to get this stuff. God is eternally patient with me, why should I not give myself this same loving attitude? There is no competition in Christ.